Blair and Me

Friday night I'm set to have drinks with Athena the Lesbian.

Blair is set to have drinks with Szymanski.

I'm sitting at my favorite Irish Bar with a dirty martini (I know, not very Irish...) waiting for Athena the Lesbian and I get a text from Blair:

We have to talk.

What the fuck?

I text back:

What for?

She texts back:

Meet me at our spot.

Our "spot" is a tiny Mexican place that has very little lighting. I'm a half hour early to meet with Athena the Lesbian, so I figure I have a little time. My first mistake. I know that if I spend 1 minute with Blair, I'm done. But I rationalize. Because there's always the possibility that within a minute, she can piss me off so badly that I'll walk out with the intention to never see her again (ha ha).

I show up at our spot, sit down across from her and order a Margarita. The only thing I say is:

What?

She's wearing a tight, low cut white top that brings out her very defined cleavage. I immediately know what her intentions are. She says:

I can't stop thinking about your dislocated shoulder.

So I'm thinking, another sympathy fuck? I say:

What about Szymanski?

She laughs. She says:

I was just using him to get to you. 

I say:

You feel sorry for me? I don't need a sympathy fuck.

She smiles. That's rare for Blair. But when Blair smiles, I'm a fucking dead man. She said:

No. You're arm in a sling has gotten me so turned on at work, I can't think straight. I can't explain it, that's just the way it is.

Alright everyone. You want a good excuse for why I caved in on Friday? I don't have one. There is no good reason I can't break it off with Blair. Ever. It's similar to the latest Batman movie. Joker needs Batman and Batman needs Joker. I forget the fucking lines, but Joker nailed it. The only difference is, when things come to a head, the climax for us is sexual, not violent. And it is the best fucking climax you can imagine.

I fucked Blair senseless on Friday night.

There is no way out and I should stop thinking there is.

Comments

[Tech-Babe]

Just like heroin...definitely, heroin.

[Paul]

And what about Athena? Well, you might have lost this fuck for now.

[Jason X]

Yeah, she's pretty pissed off. But I piss them all off on a regular basis and they all keep coming back.

[Princess of the Universe]

Ugh J- I think I dated a guy like you in University once.
Totally bad and inconsiderate blah blah- and yet I kept going back...
:P
xo

[Xaeem]

I totally buy your explanation dude...I have been through this!

[Nnamdi]

We are all happy you stopped lying to yourself. Shit like that is unhealthy.

[Jason X]

Princess: It's a quirk you find in a lot of women. But it works for me....

Xaeem: Yeah, it's beyond my control at this point. Maybe that'll change down the road. Haha. Nah...

Nnamdi: I only stopped lying to myself about this particular issue. I still lie to myself. I'm still unhealthy.

[Winter]

I'm just fascinated at how they all come back to you like little pussy boomerangs. Makes me wonder what exactly what kinda snake is hiding in your trousers. LOL