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  • Writer's pictureJason X

marjorie taylor greene proposes Christian Standard Time for the world

Updated: Feb 28, 2023




While congress debates the elimination of Daylight Saving in the US, the outspoken Representative from Georgia, Marjorie Taylor Greene, proposes the world change to CST or Christian Standard Time so that we can eliminate the need to "count on our fingers" what time it is in other countries. Additionally, she says we can get rid of apps that provide world times because those apps "are also confusing."


Greene, a member of the House Homeland Security Committee, explained further: "The United Red States of America is the greatest nation on Earth so why shouldn't the world standardize on our time zone?"


But what about the different time zones in the US? "That's easy," she responded. "The US can just use the Georgia time zone since we're the largest state in the Union."


(We'll have to fact-check that).


What makes the new global time zone proposal "Christian"? "God made this Earth, you don't think he made time zones too?"


"I realize people in many countries will be working during hours that used to be night time hours and that it will be dark as shit, but if you have a critical question for someone in the US, guess what? We're all awake too!"


Some Republicans are already pushing back. George Santos has harshly criticized the proposal. "I don't know what's going on. With anything, least of all a global time zone. But I should know, because I went to Harvard, or maybe it was Yale. So, if I oppose this, I must be right."


Elon Musk came out in support of the proposal. "If there are no time zones in space, why do we have them on Earth?"


"There are 10 billion people living in America, not counting the 17 billion undocumented illegal immigrants," Greene said. "So I think we can dictate this sort of thing for the world."


(We'll have to fact-check that one too.)


The proposal will go before congress in a few weeks and we'll update you on progress as it doesn't progress.





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